So last Friday I got the call I have been dreading. It was my boss from my job with the Department of Natural Resources. He was calling to ask if I had decided if I was going to come back to work or not. In Canada we are allowed to have a whole year of maternity leave so I haven't had to make a final decision until now (I know we are lucky). For the past few months I have been going over it and over it in my mind; what should I do? I liked my job and it could potentially lead to a better job, making contacts and getting experience, but...... I never was a career minded person but I do like working outside, in the woods. And I liked to think I was making a difference, as far as promoting sustainable resources use went. I just couldn't leave her, in my heart I knew what I had to do. By the way Chole, your post about not going back to your job helped me verbalize what I had been feeling for so long, thank you. But when I got the call in the middle of our dancing session to my favourite song "Bridal Train" from
The Waifs it was still hard to let go and say 'no thank you, I want to be a stay at home mom'. I question my expensive education and when I will use it again. I wonder if I will get enough intellectual stimulation just by being at home and in the garden. But as my daughter is weaning herself from me and I am mourning that phase of our lives, I am reminded of what a good friend said to Michael and I when discussing our financial situation=need to work. He said 'you will never get that time back' and I believe it. So I hung up the phone and pressed play on the the player and we finished our dance.
Maetia helping in the kitchen
Michael bonding/feeding Maetia
Together with the Youth Group from our church, we participated in a service project over March break. We all learned a lot by serving homeless and hungry people on the streets of Halifax. We are so proud of these kids!!
3 comments:
Sweet relief, mixed with sadness--I can imagine that is what you are feeling, I've been there. I am so thankful that you are able to stay home with Maetia. I am thankful that the decision has been made and now you can keep on dancing. I am thankful that my post was helpful to you too (sometimes rambling on my blog helps clarify things for me also). Don't stop watching for the ways that God will confirm your decision over the days, weeks, and years to come. He is so gracious.
Hi Michael and Laura. We miss you guys. It's been way too long since we've been in the same place at the same time, but I'm thankful that you've started blogging, so we can hear a few of your thoughts (even from a distance).
Anyway, we made it to Spain, and we found an apartment last week (we move in on April 1st), but this week is really the first week that I will go back to work church planting, and April will stay home with Alleke. We have mixed emotions about it both ways. In some ways, I wish I was the one staying home with Ali. In some ways, April wishes she was going back to work.
Like you said, I'm finding it difficult to put this into words, but I hear you, and we're wrestling with this too.
So I'm slow on the responding end, Laura, but I want you to know that I've been thinking about you a lot over the last while. As with Chloe, these are, I'm certain, tough decisions to make. I have the awesome blessing of getting to love "my kids" at work - the 2 go together. I love the pictures and hope and pray that your daughter knows how much her folks love her.
Love ya.
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